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27 January 2017 0 Comments

Reality vs Frightful Shadows Part 2- Phobias

ghostly tracks

Throughout childhood really weird phobias crept out of nowhere and I found myself in some cases manipulated by odd fears. To this day, I hate cars or vehicles of any sort coming up behind me. It unhinges me to no end. If I hear cars coming I either run or hide in bushes. There’s a really interesting comfort in knowing I can’t be seen. As a child, I would outrun cars walking home or find hiding places along the way home. I actually had hiding places down in my head that I could run to at a moment’s notice along the way to and from school. To this day as an adult, I have to keep myself from jumping into bushes. I’m sure Michael wouldn’t appreciate trying to coax me out of our neighbor’s bushes so I do my best to control this strange habit.

I can’t sleep with a top sheet. I don’t like the feel of it and I don’t like my feet being confined  by the weight of the top sheet and the bedspread. I have memories of being on a table and having a thick, sticky, mucus like substance draped over me. It would get really tight and I wouldn’t be able to move. My arms and legs would be held so tight that I remember screaming with no sound coming out of me.

I could turn my head side to side and look around but I couldn’t get free and the more I struggled, the tighter it would become. It would feel like hours would pass with no one coming around. In some ways that was just as bad as what the Greys were doing to me. That was probably the worst torture of all and I believe to this day that the Greys and anyone else who does this, knows it. It’s part of the mind-screw that they implement starting at young ages. To this day if I find sheets on me, I panic.

Add to the above, the uncomfortable and stressful feelings I get being in an elevator or in a car on a highway that is slowed by traffic. When I was in Paris, France years ago, I was staying at a hotel that had a small and round elevator. It was big enough just for two people. I went up it the first time and by the time we hit the floor our room was on, I was a total mess. I couldn’t breathe, I had sweat coming off my forehead and the palms of my hands were sweaty and hot. When I got to my room, I looked in the mirror and was flushed from head to toe. I looked like I had been in the sun and was a cooked lobster. It took a few hours for me to get back to normal. I walked up and down the stairs after that.

Just recently Michael and I went to go get family from the airport and the roads were full of black ice. Traffic came to a standstill, three or four times and I found myself panicking, not being able to breathe. My palms were sweaty and I was stressed beyond my limits so much so that I  almost jumped out of the car. This particular phobia, I don’t understand unless I was taken away against my will multiple times in vehicles and I associate traffic and being confined in a car to this fear.

Like most abductees, I can’t sleep with the lights off. The darkness is too vast and so much can happen in the blackness of the room. Corners in a room become hiding places for uninvited creatures and closets become doorways into the unknown. I can feel spirits looking down at me, sucking my breath away or standing by my bed staring down at me. I have been touched and shaken even with the lights on but for me, the advantage is that I can see my surroundings. The days of sleeping in a dark room were over years ago.

I grew up in an average household with two older sisters. We were middle class America with hopes and dreams just like everybody else. Maybe that was a part of this phenomenon, the more American pie people are, the better they are for target practice and to experiment on.

How does the paranormal fit into all of this? Well, for some reason abductees attract the paranormal to them and I am assuming because we carry with us a very distinct energy or frequency that becomes altered through the abductions, it stays with us throughout our lives.

Sometimes the shadows will divulge what type of  intelligence is lurking in the corner. It doesn’t matter if it’s Alien, human or spirit, I don’t like uninvited guests especially when I’m at my most vulnerable. For Empaths like myself, we don’t like surprises so turning on the light seems to be whole heck of a lot easier than waiting for the darkness to emerge.

As Michael says, sleep tight but for those of you like me, keep the lights on.

13 January 2017 0 Comments

Reality VS the Frightful Shadows

 

child-abduction-2

The paranormal can be many things for a variety of reasons. For the most part within our reality here on this planet, there are the unseen, unknowable aspects of the darkness and only what seems to be like a handful of books to address any problems lurking within the shadows. Syfy has taken liberties with imaginative monsters and dark gabled windows that reflect back more than the naked eye can see. What happens when the darkness is real, the experiences are terrifying and the impulse is to run with nowhere to hide? It’s become a rudimentary and convoluted topsy turvy problem; the reality for some reason seems to be less terrifying to fanatical listeners and distantly obsessed observers because Horror and Syfy shows have taken everything to the extreme, the impossible, and the unthinkable. People who experience the darkness these days have to prove its existence to the naysayers, when years ago, on word of mouth only and a preacher’s visit, the said acknowledgment was enough.

With this being said, to an, “In the moment Experiencer,” there is no movie comparable to living and breathing the reality of shadows and mysterious creatures. The reality of the unexplained is not only a lonely endeavor but for most people, they instinctively loath the idea and without a doubt, resolutely avoid its path. Those few brave souls like Michael and myself who do venture forward towards the unknown, become acquainted with the shadows and the shadows forever follow us. This doesn’t mean that light doesn’t peek through the shadowy silhouettes; it means that once acquainted with the unknown, one becomes altered by its association.

Here are a few experiences I have had that I can’t explain. I’ve tried to figure out scenarios that fit perfectly like puzzle pieces even though these sequences are just as fantastical as the experience. Maybe this is the first clue, what seems to be complete fantasy probably is closer to the truth and reality than what we can ever know. Aliens, Shadow People, Men in Black, Black Ops and Cryptids welcome the occasional traveler through their domains or so we think. Maybe in some cases, it’s a bit more sinister.

I don’t want to put human thought into the minds of certain beings, Aliens, Cryptids or whoever lurks in the corners. But I must say, my human mind wants clarification and tutoring into the protocols of each group. How do we understand what exists alongside us that is ultimately as foreign to us as the distant star? Those dark and mysterious reclusive souls who stay within the shadows eventually come out and show themselves in the most unusual and convoluted ways. It comes down to seeing beyond our expected reality, our eyesight’s normal range so that we can see the depth of the exceptional unknown. The question is, how do we get past our minds roadblocks?

Locations can trigger memories as far back as our earliest childhood. Blocks and unconscious association to places and people can be the hardest of all to understand. Los Alamos, New Mexico is one of those places for me. As a child along with my older sister Holly, we realized that something was off, almost  peculiar regarding the town itself. And I say town because it wasn’t very big in the 70s. We would go to visit my uncle and aunt and each visit was always accompanied by dread not only by me but my sister as well. Back then as a kid, I felt I was going to the Twilight Zone. It reminded me of a town hiding secrets and the people seemed to be strange not only in appearance but in some other odd manner that even to this day, I can’t put my finger on. My uncle worked for Los Alamos Labs but we never knew what he did, he took its secret to his grave.

Funny thing is, that I had been there a few times as an adult but I blocked out the way from both directions, a back way through  the Jemez Mountains and the other off of  I-25. With the knowledge of my childhood apprehension regarding Los Alamos, Michael and I decided to take a trip the back way into Los Alamos to see why I felt the way I did. It was lovely, the Jemez Pueblo was surrounded by red rocks and the Caldera further down the road, was magnificent in size. How on earth could I have forgotten such a beautiful place? As we went along the winding road getting closer to Los Alamos, my breathing became heavier and I started to get sweaty palms. We past an area of high grass along the highway that ventured out into pine trees. A flash of memory came back to me but I wasn’t sure at first what it was. A few days later, it hit me like a ton of bricks, a full blown memory that to this day, I can’t believe I had forgotten.

I was around 6 or 7 years old and I remember a group of men in military uniforms. Some in brown and others in blue except for … the Grey Aliens. They were testing me along with a selected group of children. We were all supposed to levitate over an area the size of a football field. They had us running along a large valley of tall grass surrounded by pine trees. I was scared and knew that I wouldn’t be able to levitate as they requested. My mind was literally mush so nothing could get through. I literally felt like a scared rabbit.  I knew that the repercussions for not doing what they asked me to do was going to be a severe punishment but I didn’t care. I knew that if I ran a little behind the other kids that there might be a chance that I could escape. I didn’t see the soldiers that surrounded us when I made a run for it and I was immediately picked up scampering in another direction. The memory stops here.

Another memory came weeks later, I was back in the same area with the other children. The Greys were levitating over us and wanted us to follow them. They had instructions for us. It was a total mind manipulation, a third eye mind meld. I remember I physically saw through another way, I think my pineal gland and I felt tingly all over as if I was half in my body and half out. I levitated a little and would fall … constantly. I’m sure I was bruised. The other kids did the same but they didn’t seem to care if we were getting hurt, they just wanted us to keep up the levitation to a point to where we could float and move from one end of the field to the other. I remember I was levitating up to about 10 feet and I was looking down at the ground below me. It was such an exhilarating feeling of not only accomplishing what they wanted but entering another place in my mind. Some voice in my head told me that I was doing a good job. As a child, I liked pleasing this group of Aliens. Good things happened when I was able to do as they asked, but the consequences I use to suffer for my failures is still blocked. In a way, I’m glad I can’t remember.

The final memory which I believe involves my childhood handler is foggier than the other memories. I was holding a man’s hand who was very familiar to me. I looked up to him more as a father figure than anything. We were standing by a 4 door sedan. I knew it was my handler’s car. There were 4 men directly in front of us in military uniforms besides other vehicles that were military. One person in particular was a high ranking officer, I believe he was a Major. He was yelling at my handler, telling him he was inappropriate with me and getting in the way of my progress. I held my handler’s hand tightly because I didn’t want him to go away. At that very moment, I had a sinking feeling that things were going to change and never be the same. I knew they were going to make me leave in another car with some stranger who I didn’t know and who would be assigned as my new handler. Something happened though it’s foggy, someone took my arm as my handler pulled me closer to him and tried to fight off whoever was trying to take me away. The memory just fades away after that. I can’t remember what happened.

If I try to explain these memories, I can’t. They are as detailed as if they happened yesterday. How do I explain or prove them? This is hard to do.

Stay tune for part 2.

 

9 March 2016 0 Comments

How many have been “Taken” ?

alien-abduction

This is a question I have been asking over the years, and the answer has evolved. There are always more that have been taken than my last estimate. The question is, how many humans have been messed with, taken against “their Will” by a non- human force. With the non- human force there would be an additional group of Hybrids – part human and part alien that need to be included. Also included in abduction scenario is the Military and as they do their own abductions to see what the Alien/ Hybrid abductions are doing to us humans.

My research started about 45 years ago and at that time I felt there was very few people taken whose stories you have heard – like Betty and Barney Hill. Just a handful and only here in the USA. These stories seemed so amazing there could not be more than a few people involved and back in the 60s there was no mention of the military being involved.

That changed for me in the 70’s when I realized that there was a high probability that a couple of my family members had had encounters with Alien type beings. And I started looking back at my experiences and yes there was evidence I had encountered the beings directly and I had suddenly developed the ability to communicate with other abductees and even help them deal with their emotional feelings about this phenomenon.

The 80’s saw me researching whole family encounters, going back generations who had encounters of the very close kind. Their abductors were almost like part of their families and were constantly monitoring the personal progress as the generations passed. Maybe they were watching some type of generic modification program of the Human species. No one truly knows for sure.

In the 90’s I started putting numbers on the abduction phenomenon – at this point I could only judge what was happening in the USA for this is where I have lived, traveled and researched. At that point I strongly felt 1 out of 4 people had had encounters with some type paranormal activity in their lives. Instead of calling it only alien abductions, I found I needed to put it all together as larger event, because it was all connected, and included ghosts, fairies, spirits, poltergeist, Sasquatch and other paranormal activity.

As my last 20 years of research had developed I have now realized that 90 % of the American public have probably had some type of paranormal encounter (including abductions) in their lifetime. The reason I say this, is that nearly everyone I have been able to build a relationship with and communicated with over a minimum period, say of several months, has freely remembered a real encounter, even though most initially said ” not me”. And remember over my lifetime I have met thousands of people, a pretty solid sampling of the general population.

Sleep tight – If you are reading this you most likely have experienced a paranormal encounter. For the paranormal is the (new) normal, embrace it, it is just another step in our evolution as a New Earth Being.
MWiz